Archive for the 'Life' Category

22
Jan
11

Reading on Gender: how language shapes our world

I’ve been focusing my studies on Gender Studies versus Violence, since I want to write about the relationship of women and militarism, which is institutionally described as masculine and patriarchal.

The more I read on Gender, more I realize how language is important and how discourses shape the way we are constructed and reproduce our world. All I’ve read until now, either by feminists or other theorists, seems to always fall on the same reductionist categorization of the social human being: first, gender; secondly, color of skin, most of times ’race’; third, sexuality; last, social class; even though this last two are fluid and change their position.

I’m using as introductory to Gender Studies: Richardson, Diane, Robinson, Victoria (eds) (2008)Introducing Gender and Women’s Studies, 3rd Ed, Palgrave MacMillan: New York, which is an attempt to demonstrate the development of gender studies without taking sides, but is for me a very feminist approach to gender. In all chapters, which are small articles written by different authors, I always find written: ’white, male, heterosexual, middle class’; to me a radical feminist and western approach of social categories.

After reading, not just this book but also other articles online and from books (through SOAS Library), I’ve been realizing that my own discourse falls in this reductionist categorization, and I’ve accepted, not without criticizing it, that my view of the social world is constructed in this way. Of course, I also reproduce it through my discourse; even thought I recognize its reductionism, I find hard to overpass it.

Foucault was right: discourse constructs the topic, defines and produces the objects of our knowledge, and since knowledge is connected to power, it assumes the authority of ’the truth’ and has the power to make itself true.

But discourse is fluid, and language, the base of discourse, is also a living thing, therefore discourses can change…

 

27
Dec
10

Haw in search of cheese

This Christmas I decided I need to change my life.

In the former post I spoke about my different Christmas; nothing better than a different experience to made me see that change is good! So here I go and this next year I’ll struggle with myself to change what I believe is my negativism and my laziness.

Starting today, first Monday after Christmas, I decided to fast; even though I’m working (now I’m just enjoying my hour break writing), fasting is the best measure to clean my body and my mind. It will be my starting point, only drinking water, coffee and tea.

I also promised myself I would do a diary of my behaviour, to analyse how my negativism is the trigger of my own destruction. From there I’ll be able to confront it and turn it into positivism.

So, here I go… now back to work!

27
Dec
10

Back from the Future: For the first time in my 36 years of living…

As I post before, it’s not easy to live in London. My life has been a big mess and I totally forgot about this blog. But I’m gonna try to be back, because I suddenly feel I need to start writing again. Somehow I had that feeling of expressing myself and this is the best way to do it. So here it goes a bit of what has been happening lately with myself:

For the first time in my 36 years of living, I’ve spent Christmas away from Home (I decided to look at Home with a capital H as Portugal, Lisbon, and home, with an h, as the place where I live now, since home is where we are living!). It was a very different experience. I spent it three Bangladeshi and one German; of which two are Muslims and one is Catholic, and the German girl is also Catholic. It wasn’t what I could call a Christian Christmas, but we all blessed the fact that we had food in hour table and health to enjoy it.

Also, for the first time in my 36 years of living I was responsable to cook turkey… bless Youtube and Chef John, since my turkey was really well done and the guys at home liked it. And it was funny, because William also helped me and we shared some knowledge.

Life in London may have not been easy until now, but definitely has been very rich in sharing life experiences; I’ve learned a lot!

We cooked and we eat, altogether,  two Muslim guys, one Catholic guy, one Catholic girl and me, raised Catholic but Agnostic. There was no religion in our dinner table, even thought Christmas is a Christian festivity. There was only laugh and happiness of being alive, well and feeling of sharing.

After dinner, the guys went to our living room and I went talking with my parents on Skype. They were in my ex-sister-in-law house, spending Christmas together. I stayed with them until half past one, watching them sharing gifts and seeing how happy my niece and they were; I also felt happy and in that moment distance was no longer there.

On the next day I went picking up Moussa to stay with me a few hours. Again, we end up sharing, this time our countries cultural richness; we saw belly dancing, a Berber dance in a wedding and Portuguese folklore.

I guess an Algerian guy and a Portuguese girl might have a future together; who knows?!

This was my Christmas. And now back to reality, real life of working and keep on studying; work to survive and studying to share knowledge.

31
Jan
10

Viver em Londres… é duro, duro, duro!

Hoje tenho a cabeça num melão! Porque será? Mais uma festa nesta noite que passou. Comer, dançar, conversar e beber muito. Claro que hoje acordei com a boca a saber a papeis de música.

O interessante nesta noites é que as conversas acabam sempre em sexo! É sempre o assunto que vem à baila. Ontem estivemos a confraternizar sobre as posições. Chegámos à conclusão que há umas boas centenas delas e que cada um de nós tem a(s) sua(s) preferida(s).

Foi uma conversa a quatro sem qualquer tipo de pudor e tornou-se numa aula tipo Chiquinho Vaz da Silva; sexo teórico. Mas não quer dizer que não houvesse quem quisesse praticar, mas o ambiente não estava suficientemente liberto de preconceitos societais para 2 gajas e 2 gajos se engalfinharem!

Mas foi sem dúvida uma noite muito interessante e muito esclarecedora. O Chiquinho tem razão: a vida resume-se ao termo COMER. Felizmente que assim é, porque ao menos ambos actos nos dão prazer, social e físico.

Realmente, viver em Londres… é duro, duro, duro! Sempre em festa e a f… nem que seja em fantasia!

19
Jan
10

Hoje estou feliz… porque… não sei!

Sabem porque é que não tenho dado notícias? Há já duas semanas que me tenho sentido miseravelmente mal e finalmente… FINALMENTE hoje acordei bem disposta e tenho tido um dia muito agradável!

Acordei pelas 9h e levantei-me às 9h30… hem, passavam dois minutos… vesti-me e respondi ao anúncio para trabalhar numa associação de gays, lésbicas e bisexuais. Comi um iogurte e um pão com manteiga e fiambre. Saí de casa, passei pela lavandaria para conversar com a Andrea, fui à Uni fazer uma pergunta no meu Departamento e fui aos Correios entregar a carta da minha candidatura ao trabalho na associação.

Cheguei a casa, vi os meus mails e arrumei algumas coisas no meu mini-quarto… que se não estiver arrumado eu não me consigo mexer cá dentro. Pelas 16h40 vesti-me para ir correr e saí porta fora às 17h em ponto. Comecei a correr pelas 17h10, porque levei cerca de 10 minutos a chegar ao ponto onde quis começar a correr.

O local onde corri é maravilhoso e vou continuar a fazer as minhas próximas corridas no mesmo sítio. É junto a um dos lagos aqui ao pé de casa, junto a Crossharbour. É maravilhoso correr à noite e ver as luzes reflectidas na água. Foi muito reparador do meu estado físico e psicológico.

Corri 2 km sem parar. Depois andei cerca de 1 km e conversei com o meu mano via tlm. Voltei a correr mais 1 km. E acabei bem, porque não me sinto muito cansada e quis começar com um leve esforço. Consegui!

Cheguei a casa, tomei banho e fiz o meu jantar! Cheira a Portugal, porque é bacalhau com batatas, tomate, cebola e alho, feito no tacho. Ah, só adicionei um  ingrediente à La Moussa: um pouco de canela! Está um ‘must’! Eis:

Aproveitei para conversar com a Andrea e o Moussa e… hoje está a ser um excelente dia! Hoje estou feliz!

10
Jan
10

My life: It’s a spiral stair with no banister!

Here is my English translation of the David Mourão Ferreira’s poem:

It’s a spiral stair

With no banister

Goes forward the sun

But never crosses the floor

The stairs, higher they get

More broken they are,

No frights neither scares

Are even lessons

Who’s afraid don’t go up,

Who has dreams, neither.

There are those who threw away

The ballast of their heart

We go up running

Get dangerous in vain.

Guess what: it is life

A stair with no banister.

This is a special one for me, because that’s my life: a spiral stair with no banister. But this is the way I like to live my life. As Osho (2006) says in Perguntas às suas respostas: Desafios para mentes abertas (In English: Your Answers Questioned – Explorations for Open Minds):

«Ponha tudo em jogo. Seja um jogador! Arrisque tudo, porque o momento seguinte não é certo, estão para quê dar-se ao trabalho? Para quê preocupar-se? Viva o perigo, viva a alegria. Viva sem medo, viva sem culpa. Viva sem qualquer medo do inferno nem qualquer ganância pelo céu. Simplesmente viva.» (p. 27)

My English translation: “Put all at stake. Be a player! Risk all, because the next moment is not the right one, s0 why give yourself that effort? Why worry? Live the danger, live the joy. Live without fear, live with no guilt. Live without any fear of hell with no freed for heaven. Just live.”

I think this is the way I live my life; no fear, put all at risk and at stake. I’m a “natural” player. Life for me is a game, that’s always asking me: wanna play? And I just can’t say no. I’m addicted to this game; the game of life! And love to play it! I love to take risks! I love to cry because things went wrong, but a few minutes later laugh, higher than I can, because I achieved what I wanted! This is me! No doubt! And my life is a spiral stair with no banister, in which I try to climb without falling. And even when I fall, I try again to climb it! I have a strong will to reach its top and I know I can. All I need it to follow Osho’s thought:  “Put all at stake. Be a player! Risk all (…) Just live.

09
Jan
10

É uma estrada em caracol … adivinhaste: é a vida!

É uma escada em caracol
E que não tem corrimão.
Vai a caminho do sol
Mas nunca passa do chão.

Os degraus, quanto mais altos,
Mais estragados estão,
Nem sustos nem sobressaltos
Servem sequer de lição.

Quem tem medo não a sobe,
Quem tem sonhos também não.
Há quem chegue a deitar fora
O lastro do coração.

Sobe-se numa corrida,
Corre-se p’rigos em vão.
Adivinhaste: é a vida
A escada sem corrimão.

David Mourão-Ferreira

09
Jan
10

A small step for man and giant step for Portuguese mankind

I may be drunk, because we had a party in the house tonight, but I’m sober enough to write this post congratulating all the Portuguese politicians that didn’t allow a referendum (a waste of money in a pseudo-democracy) and voted today for recognition of the homosexual marriage. Finally a simple human right is being partly fulfilled, the willing of choosing and being socially recognized has maker of the that choice. I know this is only a social matter, but society is everything for Humans and when we are not recognized by our own society we feel like we are not part of it. All people want is to be “normal”, and “normality” means having the same rights because we all are “normal” humans who have the right to be recognized as “normal” citizens. I just hope one day, in a short period, adoption will also be allowed for homosexual couples. A mother figure and a father figure are social constructions and like thirty years ago people thought that children would not be “normal” grownups raised only by one of the parents, and nowadays we can see that they are “normal” human beings, why shouldn’t a child with two mothers or two fathers be a “normal” future grownup?  Please MVA keep on fighting! Don’t give up just because you can marry with the person you love! Keep on fighting for the reconstruction of society’s idea of “normality”!

P.S.: I’m no longer drunk, but tonight really did drink too much and it inspired me to write this post and to write my book review.

29
Dec
09

A gaiola das loucas … corridas de S. Silvestre!

A minha vinda a Lisboa, para passar o Natal com a família, leva para Londres uma história para contar.

Coisas do meu maninho! Increveu-me na corrida de S. Silvestre de Lisboa, no domingo passado, dia 27 de Dezembro de 2009, e lá fui eu.

Com o dorsal lá fui eu correr desde a Praça D. Pedro IV até ao Rossio. Descendo a Rua do Ouro, virando para o Cais do Sodré via Rua do Arsenal, e desta virando para a Praça do Comércio, percorrendo a Ribeira das Naus e seguindo pela Av. Infante D. Henrique até ao Campo das Cebolas. Aí, foi virar até chegar à Rua da Alfandega e desta até à Rua da Prata. Desta segui até ao Rossio, subi a Av. da Liberdade e, fazendo inversão de marcha, desci a mesma até chegar novamente à Praça D. Pedro IV. Esta foi apenas a primeira volta.

Até aqui tudo bem, tive alguma companhia. A partir do Rossio, passei a fazer o resto do percurso; novamente a volta via Ribeira das Naus e Campo das Cebolas; sozinha. Só de corredores, mas bem acompanhada. Tive direito a escolta policial e uma ambulância só para mim, porque… fui a última das últimas! Orgulhosamente, nunca desisti e fiz os 10 km. A maioria fiz a caminhar a passo largo e veloz, mas também corri! Orgulhosamente, muitos foram os que fizeram corta-mato e desistiram ao fim da primeira volta, e eu percorri os 10 km, sem nunca cortar caminhos! Orgulhosamente cheguei ao fim de 1h33m10s, tive direito a uma e faço parte da lista de resultados (em http://www.saosilvestredelisboa.com), como última atleta a cortar a meta!

Class. Geral Nome Clube Dorsal Escalão Class. Esc. Sexo 5 km Tempo Tempo Chip
3051 Ana Cristina Canhoto 3808 Senior 235 F 00:50:34 01:33:10 01:30:47

ESTOU MUITO ORGULHOSA DE MIM! PORQUE NUNCA DESISTI E DIVERTI-ME MUITO!

06
Dec
09

Me and my food!

This time I made chicken breasts with rice. Made some creamy sauce and put them on the oven, to grill with some cheese.

I’m becoming an expert in cooking!




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